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What is a Drama Triangle? Why should you not be a victim of it?

Well, let us ask ourselves,

Do we get prescriptions from people next door or someone who is not qualified to be a doctor? Do we get offers of money that are huge to some strangers? Do we allow anyone to step inside our home and tell us how to maintain a home?


Then why are we ready to get advice and suggestions from people around us? Well, even though there may be important people in our lives, there are many limitations to this approach. Though it may resolve to some extent, friends or elders may not be listening very carefully and end up giving advice that can harm the relationship rather than being helpful.

What you think is right and what others are wrong is highly contextual and an expert can only understand it. It's possible that they may influence their belief systems, values, and judgements upon you and may take sides. The worst part is they can be biased since they know you well.

They may feel angry and make you feel that “it's all your fault”, “You ruined it”. Another person may feel sad for you they made try to console you or comfort you by saying “Poor you let me help you” on hearing this you will act like a wounded child and you may say “It always happens to me” and you sympathize yourselves. It may comfort you at that moment but trust me this never going to work out. Please be informed you will either be a victim now or later. That's what they call it as “drama triangle” in psychology.

Now, to the people who would like to get advice or suggestions from someone. Ask yourself if that person is really qualified to sort this issue for you or are they going to say things only to make you feel better or make it worse. And have they really walked in your shoes and you choose to obey as per their guidance.

Let us see now how professional guidance can help us.

What is Mental Health?

Mental health encompasses emotional, psychological, and social well-being. It influences thinking ability, perception about others or any Life/Work scenarios, and how we respond, react or behave to any situations. This determines how we handle stress, interpersonal relationships, and decision-making.

Why is mental health very important?

It is very important because it affects how we think, feel and act. It also helps us to determine how we handle stress, how we handle our emotions, how we deal with others and also with the choices that we make. So, our personal & Professional life impacted directly or indirectly we are not in optimal mental health.

What is counselling?

Counselling is NOT simply advising but helping people to help themselves. This involves a Professional relationship between a counsellor and a client in which the client is trained to take care of his mental health. So you are empowered to deal with situations rather depending on anyone.

Who is a counsellor?

A counsellor is a professionally qualified person. He/she is trained to understand and help people. They have the skills to treat cognitive, emotional, behavioural health problems. They use several counselling techniques in empowering individuals to cope with anxiety, stress and any crises in life. A counsellor is useful in remedial as well as preventive treatment. He/she would also help the client in self-growth.

Why not just talk to a friend/well-wisher such as teachers, colleagues and relatives?

Of course, well-wishers are very important people in our lives. In the busy life of the present, friends and family have their own problems and may not be listening very carefully and unintentionally end up giving advice that may actually prove more harmful than helpful. They may not be able to look at you objectively. They can be biased unconsciously because they have preconceived notions about you. There is a possibility that they can influence you with their personal values and judgments. When issues are complex, they may become anxious and transfer their anxiety to you, whereas a professional assesses you based on scientific knowledge.

So, choose wisely. Your mental health is not everyone's business or concern but your own precious asset for life. Counselling services are given to the needy and who are willing to work on it. In the end you will feel empowered and take charge of your life’s situation and try to solve the conflicts or issues. You can't solve your issue unless you take ownership of it. All the Best!

Book your slot today and break free from your chains! To seek professional counselling services.

I am your coach

Rosy Iyenkutty

CEO- Radical Image Consulting

Trainer/Consultant/Counselling psychologist

"Mental health…is not a destination, but a process. It’s about how you drive, not where you’re going." — Noam Shpancer, PhD

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